when there is nothing left to burn you have to set yourself on fire...

Thursday, October 27, 2005


the snow is (or was) amazing... we had a snowball fight at 1 in the morning after experimental theatre, and it was cold as fuck, yet delightfully exhilarating.

i woke up the next morning and the snow had melted all away. it feels so tragic...

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

it was pouring today. wet and nasty, and i kept telling myself that it was still warmer that it is going to be. well huh. now i'm in the library, and it just started snowing. its quite mesmerizing... just looking out the window at the snow.

bollocks. its fucking snowing. its times like these that i really miss home.

Monday, October 24, 2005

stars, con't.

i keep dreaming although i cannot sleep,
moonlight passing softly into the morn.

so at dawn i wake covered in stars;
shaking the bedclothes they fall to the floor.
i watch them strewn there, dead and dull by day.

Sunday, October 23, 2005

drunk, topless, and incurably british.

where do 2 mike's hard lemonades, a twisted tea, 2 rum and cokes and a smirnoff thingie get you?

naked in a bathtub.

hmm kinda sums up last night. it was amazing though. in retrospect, it felt like some guy's hokey fantasy. 6 (beautiful!) women having girls night, getting completely smashed on chick drinks and taking off various articles of clothing. and all in unceasing british accents. in fact, as i was still somewhat drunk this morning when i awoke, ally, josie and i continued to speak in british accents. i believe this is a stepup from my scottish accent at beta beach and the french incident before the foam party.

so scratch my previous post because apparently i'm back on/off/underneath/around/on top of the wagon.

and bully for phsyical puns (like me under the table last night).

Monday, October 17, 2005

count the mistakes...

demain, j'aurais mon premier examen du francais. aujourd'hui, la derniere jour avant l'examen, j'ai fini le livre (et le film du livre), et en plus il faut que j'apprenne tous ces termes pour decrire le poesie. oh lala! quelle horreur! j'aime le francais beaucoup, et j'aime le fait que je connais un langue different que l'anglais. je sens que je suis la, pres de connaitre tout le langue, mais au meme temps c'est au loin. pour parler avec le debit, il faut plonger dans le langue dans un facon courageux. moi, je ne suis pas courageuse, ou confiante, mais ca ne fait rien. j'ai un examen demain, et je suis "fucked."

Sunday, October 16, 2005

this is qma's picture, and it makes me sooooo happy. bully for UHS!

its my party...

so last night i did something truly rebellious. i put down my 3/4 full beverage (heaven forbid i should waste my keystone!) grabbed josie and just walked out of the party. didn't say goodbye, didn't make any lame excuses. just left. and we walked up the hill, made some popcorn, and watched when harry met sally. and it was the best saturday night that i've had on campus.

it was so liberating - i felt like i was staying in not because i couldn't find a party to go to (in fact i left one) or because i was alone (josie and i had a nice date) but because it was what i truly wanted to do.

i'm not sure if the exciting newness of college is wearing off, or if i'm just tired of getting completely blasted every weekend. last night i just knew that i couldn't drink myself into a good time. being drunk doesn't make me a better person, wittier, funnier, more attractive or anything. i don't like who i am as a drunk. yet i keep drinking and drinking and i have no control. i feel like each weekend i breach all new thresholds in drunkeness. so i stepped back last night and sort of examined the situation, and realized a lot of things. such as: the majority of the times that i have (a) been on stage (b) been with a guy and (c) hung out with my friends outside of class/studying/eating have all been while intoxicated. i'm too dependent on alcohol for too many things. hopefully, this is all going to change. sometimes, movie night at home is the best option.

Saturday, October 15, 2005


boys are assholes. (sorry ryan and jon... you guys are exceptions to the rule). well i actually have nothing to say beyond that. fuck you menfolk.

Thursday, October 13, 2005

so i wake up covered in stars

i completely crashed today. i realized somewhere in the middle of our psych class that 5 hours of sleep a night can catch up to you something fierce. so i skipped french (what a bad ass!) and slept for 2 hours. i had some weird dream invovling facebook and my job at the admissions office, but i don't really remember. anyway ....

i've decided that its high time for me to start writing down random song lyrics as they come to me (which they do on occasion):

so every morning i wake up covered in stars,
and as i shake the bedclothes they fall to the floor...

(now listening to: the good life and radiohead)

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

first post

so jon shia made me get a blog... anyway... here's my first post (yay!) i've kinda been out of practice since the diaryland days of yore, so we'll see how it goes.

fuck you. peace.